How to Choose a Therapist That’s Right for You
If you’re reading this, you’re probably interested in pursuing therapy or coaching and are wondering where to start. If you’ve thought about it, or if you’ve wondered if therapy could help you - this is your sign to start! I’m a firm believer that therapy is for everyone. And no, you don’t need to be having an issue to seek therapy. This guide will help you to choose a therapist that’s right for you.
While cultivating the courage to seek support from therapy or coaching, it is expected that this process may feel difficult or overwhelming at first. Therapy can be a vulnerable experience, and your feelings of safety and support are important in the process.
There is countless research that shares that the bond between you and your therapist (or coach) is the most essential factor in the therapeutic relationship and in your growth. That’s why it’s vital to do some exploring, ask questions, and pay attention to your intuition in your search for a therapist that’s right for you.
There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to therapy, and the professional that works well for someone else might not work as well for you. As a therapist and coach, as well as a client myself, these are my tried + true methods on how to choose a therapist that’s right for you!
Before the Consultation
Spend some time thinking about what it is that’s bringing you to seek therapy. This is helpful to share during your initial consultations with therapists, and will also guide them to determine how and if they will be able to support your needs. Think about what you are hoping will change about your life through therapeutic work. Also, consider how often you would like to see your therapist, weekly, bi-weekly?
On your search, you can ask trusted people in your life for recommendations on therapists, or you can choose from a handful of therapy search engines listed below.
In doing your research on a therapist, you’ll want to look at their website or social media accounts (if they have one for their practice). At the very minimum, a therapist’s website should include information about their education, certifications, specializations, and practice style or approach. All of this will give you more information on whether this person will be able to support you in the ways you need. I suggest you keep an open mind while reading their descriptions, as there are many different approaches to therapy, and there is little evidence that any one kind of therapy is better than another. Again, what’s most important is that you feel this person may be able to support you, and that you’re interested enough to consult with them.
The Call
Once you’ve narrowed down a few therapists whose profiles resonate with you, you can reach out for a consultation call. During the call, you’ll want to share a bit about what you’ve already prepared (your background, the specific reasons bringing you to seek therapy, and what your needs may be with frequency + availability).
The first session or consultation is an opportunity to “interview” your therapist and decide if they are a good fit for you.
Meant to be or not?
It’s normal to feel nervous during an initial consultation, especially if you’ve never sought therapy before. Know that this is quite common to feel.
As you speak about the reasons that brought you to seek therapy, consider how you feel when talking to the therapist. Do you feel heard? Do you feel comfortable thus far? Does the therapist validate the reasons that brought you to seek therapy? These are signs of green flags for choosing a therapist that’s right for you. Remember that therapy is about human connection! Your intuition will be a helpful guide at this point to determine if you feel at ease enough with this therapist to seeking support.
Remember that there is always some wiggle room for growth; this is the start of a brand new relationship after all. What’s important is that you feel comfortable enough to bring up anything that might help your therapist help you. And that you feel comfortable enough to bring personal matters to the table with this person in the future.
Another point to consider when interviewing your therapist is to ask if they are affirming of your lifestyle and values. You might also ask if they are knowledgeable and understanding of your gender expression, sexual orientation, race, culture, or ability. Therapy is about you. You deserve to feel seen, understood, and receive non judgemental support. What feels safe and supportive to you in this process is paramount.
What else should I ask?
During your consult, you might ask what a typical session might look like. Some other questions to consider are: Do you offer a sliding scale? What’s your cancellation policy? Do you prescribe medication if needed or recommend someone? Will I receive a diagnosis? (Health insurance companies typically require therapists to provide a diagnosis, just to note, you are not your diagnosis and can always ask your therapist for more information on this!) Finally, you might ask how the therapist measures goals and how often you will review progress together.
It’s more than okay to take a few days to decide how you felt about your consult or interview another therapist. When you consider what your intuition says about your consult, as well as combined factors like your comfort level and the therapist’s qualifications, you might have a clearer understanding if you’d like to move forward. You always deserve to feel safe and understood in this process. Once you’ve found a therapist that’s right for you, you can begin working on your therapeutic goals.
